Deserted and in love

I want to store us in a mason jar and use the contents when I forget what I've learned. Let's just be young and do anything and everything we want to. Let's run at full speed and make things happen. I've craved the clear vision I had with you in the endless country.

Just 2 kids in the desert, their only cares were sunshine and each other. They lived by no rules except freedom. Silent laughs and greasy hair, youth was their biggest weapon.

Gila - Beach House by Koolkat Kurtman

Beyond the Library

"If we lack the courage to shape our lives by constantly generating love, fear usually takes up the reins and creates all kids of brilliant havoc. Some of our greatest artistic creations have probably sprouted from such modest, moldy demons as paranoia and indecision. Those polarized by fear and over-thinking often share a rare disorder in creation, always in a perpetual hurdle leap to push past the pervious and arrive at an unattainable.

i guess, you know what the sun’s all about when the lights go out."

-Rachel Lynch

Embracing this period of time. This time where little seems right and I'm drifting along. I know it's necessary, though. I have to solidify the in betweens and desires. What I've learned is that confusion and wandering is part of the complete process. You gotta work from the inside out, or else you'll never really be able to achieve the unthinkable.

I've got assignments that go far beyond the late night library visits.

Marriage - Gold Panda by funktional

Going back to Cali

I dig this. Something about their sound, and the fact their EP is up for free on SoundCloud. It's so great that musicians are developing a sort of guilt for making their fans pay to listen to their music. If you think about it, musicians play music because they want to play music, and they have passion for it (if they didn't nobody would listen, or like it for that matter). They do it because it is who they are and what they do. Money is a plus but hopefully not the reason to play it in the first place. If a band is making good music, they'll get their rewards. Guards - Trophy Queen (feat. Caroline Polachek) by Toast Press

Going home to Mt. Shasta today. I know I'll miss Portland by the end of the break, even though Portland and I have a sort of iffy relationship. I know once I step back and see the opposite, I'll have the same urge to come back and experience this unfamiliar and intriguing place. Even though so many days I feel like I'm a floater, lost and confused.

Try to hold onto my drink and my heart

Musicians are just people who have found a source to express their normal people like problems. Case in point, this song. 

"The music is loud and time travels fast,
things that feel good are things that don't last, 
while you go off looking for friends in the dark,
I try to hold on to my drink and my heart."

Dry sky

And the worst thing you could do is suffer inside your head. The most freedom I 've ever felt was when my mind was clear from self-questioning. Without that, real progress is made. Lets get this show on the road, I know the great things I'm capable of.

I am nothing without a sharp mind, fitted to think pure and powerful thoughts.


TAMARYN-mild confusion by The Drift Record Shop

Dark from your head to your toes

After a week of busy homework and assignments, I'm exploring blogs and listening to Pavement and James Blake. This week has been hard, school wise and me wise. I'm fighting so hard to find my rhythm, and the best part is once I do (which I will), It will be heaven. Heaven in the rainy and tidy streets of PDX. I wonder how someone like her so happily bobs her head to the music coming from the ear buds. If she can be happy at 11 p.m. in a messy dorm room, why can't I? The gray shades of routines and loneliness are tugging at my legs. But this time, I'm gonna rescue myself.


James Blake - Air & Lack Thereof by AMMtru

Over quick and awkward cigarette conversations, you tell me you wouldn't care if you were dead. You like the possibility of dying at any given moment. You're so twisted and exactly the type I visualized as a dreamy and curious 18 year old stuck in the mountains.You even wear the same clothing as I imagined. Often all in black, from your hair to your dark eyes to your boots. You add to the broken record. Working a relationship backwards. It's obviously become a consistency. But you, my eerie friend, will soon see me in my raw form. And I'll be hesitant and gentle. Soon, I will touch and feel each fresh step on the pavement. I will move past this time and discover the unknown I've been dreaming of. Soon, I will have mustered up the strength to unravel.

I'll Be Wait For Sadness Comes Along

Oh, the shit I should be doing instead of this. I sat down at my computer, ready to crank out some more homework. But I didn't. Instead, I gave my soul some happy music. So easy to get lost in the internet, looking at band's websites, discovering new songs you love in the first 10 seconds. Or looking at somebody's twitter page that you are fascinated with. It's all so accessible. Reading conversations between some of your favorite musicians. Knowing the name you see on hypemachine everyday with triple digit red hearts on the right is actually a person, just like you. What a life to live, a life of pure expression and, well, fun. A way to be happy on this earth, maybe. I'll Be Wait For Sadness Comes Along by chrome sparks

The Mountain

Between spending time in Bend this weekend, hearing Pavement's song mention "Shasta", and now finding and loving this song.... I am reminded of the part of me that yearns for the beauty of the mountains. Even being able to take a walk under a bluebird sky, the next morning after a storm or sitting by crystal alpine lakes at sunrise.... I am looking for a different form of complete peace here in Portland. Heartless Bastards - The Mountain by tadpolegames

I call it, Novembeard

http://www.mediafire.com/file/iae9b8xddcqj6rn/christinasplaylist.rar

November playlist right thurrrr.

(Downloading zipeg might be necessary to unzip this)

Just a collection of songs I've been into in the recent months. Lately, all I want to listen to is rock. Indie rock, if you will. Went through a really long phase where all I listened to was electronic dance music, one day that changed, and here I am. From time to time I'll download electro or a remix (some of it is really impressive), but for the most part I'm looking for this type of stuff. There's not much that can replace the sound of wholesome instruments and vocals, at least that's how I feel about it now.

The snow is falling in the Pacific NW. I love seeing everybody's reaction, they're totally freakin' out. Snow is such a beautiful thing. In my opinion, it's prettier if it's burying plants and sidewalks and making everything seem still. Here, it's just moving through the sky and turning into moisture before it hits the ground. But whatever the type, it was awesome to see all the kids pour out of the buildings to celebrate it. Cheering like children in the frozen wind.

Breakneck Speed

Damn this song pumps me up. I heard this a few weeks ago, asked my friend the name of the band and I found it today while going through music. Was a really busy week but part of me really enjoys staying in constant flow, even if it is with school. Hello, weekend. Tokyo Police Club - Breakneck Speed by The Drift Record Shop

Gold Soundz

Aaahh. This song is so perfect at this moment, who knows why, it just gives me a feeling. A feeling that is closest to being described by this song. And I know it's totally specific to this exact moment, these circumstances, my reality right here, right now. At this second, I know what I want, and that's not the case for most seconds. Although I might "want" something different tomorrow, the fact that I have something to focus on right now makes me feel in control of my life.

The funny thing about music is how different it affects people. It's more than just the notes, instruments, beats, or lyrics. In the end it's just about the emotion it evokes. And often, that emotion is completely unique to that one person who always gets that certain feeling when listening to that one song.

  Pavement - Gold Soundz by pluxy

What the Bleep

http://topdocumentaryfilms.com/what-the-bleep-do-we-know/

Click on that for some serious reevaluation of life as we know it.


Just by living in a way where I'm aware of the possibilities makes those possibilities even more real. Our world and our life is directly shaped by our conscious and our perception of reality. Watch this and you'll see the science behind it. Recommend taking the time for this one, puts things into a different light.

Fucking Create Something Awesome

Smith Westerns - Weekend by forcefieldpr


 Don't look to others for reassurance. It's all from you. Do what feels right. Be yourself in all flying colors and expressions. Who gives A FUCK. The right people will always find you or you will come to them. Things do work out. In the meantime, fucking create something awesome.

I give myself advice when I'm feeling uncomfortable.


;)

Diamond Eyes

It was about 3:30 now and the sun was just beginning to lower behind the buildings of Portland (which we could see perfectly from our high retreat.) We brought two sixers with us of dark beer. The camera was being passed around, to whoever had a purpose for it. Which is when the best pictures are snapped. Jonas brought his portable speakers and we plugged our ipods into them and played our favorite tunes while the sun became our height. A golden glow pierced to our diamond eyes. We caught it all on vintage brown film. A sweet fall afternoon, dipped into the evening pinch and danced around the thick of the dark. We had no plans for the morning, no plans for the night. Plans become too organized and too structured when you're watching the night sky. 

Match Your Energy With Mine

My weekend has officially begun. This week was a little slow but I can barely remember it at the same time. Let's hope for a recharging weekend.... happy Halloween!

Very "new" band, just found this track on the webs. Love their lo-fi poppy sound (I think that's what it's called.)

Reading Rainbow - Always On My Mind by HOZAC RECORDS

Desire Lines

Listen to a happy song when you're feeling blue.



By the way, 3:00

:)

Sea of Colors

This song is one of my favorite dub step tunes. Not really into the big, gritty bass thing but this song is totally the exception. It has so much more going on than just fidgety loud noise. Such an amazing song to play at a fun party, people go wild.

"they’re crazy to think they can stop me. every second of doubt is quickly diminished by the will to achieve something better than myself. If you want something, you have to go out to the park and get the damn thing." velvetcigarette.com



Enjoy...


DJ Fresh - Gold Dust (Flux Pavillion Remix) by imaginechris2

Take Your Medicine

Saw Starfucker on Wednesday night. They were awesome live. All but one of them were decked out in dresses, body lights and wigs. I scored an awesome, roomy section right by the stage where I could enjoy the music and dance a little away from the mosh pit (yes, there was one.) I think they only played 6 or 7 songs but it was definitely worth the 15 bucks.

'Medicine' was my favorite tune they played. Happy Friday!

Medicine by starfucker_usa

Bonobo

I heard this song a long time ago but someone put it on last night and I couldn't help but fall back into it. It's really smooth and can be played on repeat.

02-bonobo-kiara-frb by Spa_Water

In Our Underwear

I like this song a lot. Good synth action, great for running around and exercising to- blasting at the end of the day when you feel accomplished.

"We're running down the street in our underwear, cause nothing ever happens here, nothing ever happens here. Oh my lord."

FM Belfast // Underwear by Mood-for.fr

"Contrary to popular opinion, we have the power to create and manifest anything we want, the law of transmutation is very real and if you’re not happy with any situation it’s truly in your hands to change it to whatever you want."

Read this quote just now on http://www.etmusiquepourtous.com. I really dig that blog because of the personal look into the guy's emotions, advice, experiences. Not to mention all the cool tracks he posts.

Sitting here waiting for my 2:00 class, it's kind of weird that it starts so late. Doing my best to keep up with my assignments, although I haven't been hit with many yet.

Most of my thoughts are dedicated to the things I moved here for: the mindset, the "scene", music, photography, boys, girls, the urban lifestyle. I'm staying focused on the way I'd like to my life to be, because I know that is always a good driving force in making it happen. Concentration, action, bravery, these are all essential to making one's dreams come true. Sometimes I lose track of the bigger scheme of things (I've only been here for 2 1/2 weeks!) Patience is so important. If you believe and remember patience, then you know it is only a matter of time when things start to happen how you'd like them to. Just knowing this automatically gives you a sense of relief. There's no way things won't work out if your head is in the right place, you stay open-minded, and you keep trying.

"If you’re focusing on the past or the future so much, it means you’re not doing what you need to do this moment to change any of it. When you're not in the moment your really not even existing, think about it, the past is gone, the future is unknown so thinking about that leaves you in some sort of limbo world that has nothing to do with your reality right now – be present every day." - Et Musique Pour Tous

Real Estate - Beach Comber by gpferrero

New and the Same

I've just come to Portland, Oregon to begin my new chapter. I'm living in the dorms, eating far too much at the buffet, and trying to become settled. Classes are fun and I've met some cool friends. Doing my best to keep trudging along in the face of a shocking, but pleasant transition. I guess this blog will be a place for me to jot down what I'm digging or communicate stuff I want to tell the world. In other words, a big collection of stuff that in a way describes me.

Til next time...