web of hypocrisy

You know how there's that saying... "people will eat you alive if you let them", or "hold your head high gorgeous, they'd love to see you fall"? Yeah, it's totally true. I've got a fucking opinion and am allowed to voice it, and if that sparks heavy disagreements and me feeling attacked, then so be it. You're not better than me because all you want is to win. That's not the point. The point is to appreciate other's views and maybe learn a thing or two from them- not to oppress those who have the balls to share them in the first place.




It's important to remember that every thing/person/idea/object must start somewhere. And if that means rightfully sharing a piece of your mind and feeling a gang of angry women gang up on you for doing so, then that's on those hypocrite's conscious, not yours.

Man it feels good to be young

Just one of those good nights for music (meaning i found a cool blog). SPRING BREAK literally starts tomorrow. I feel like I've been counting down to this for a long time. It's only going uphill from here on out.

This song is lovely, it reminds me of an older song... nice organic sounds. Really into the acoustic stuff lately with a heavy emphasis on bands I used to hear when I was younger because my cool older sister played them.

p.s. http://birdlips.bandcamp.com/album/one-tongue
Free Download

The Woods

Something about the morning. Maybe it's that I can have coffee, the warm comfort of the bitter and dark flavor. Music sounds so fresh on my ears after 8 hours of stagnance. Sometimes in the morning, I am really excited to be alive. If there's one thing that I will always have to give me some pleasure, it'll be the early hours of the day, potential and pent-up happiness just waiting to be poured out.






"The idea started from this feeling that I've had for most of my adult life, and influenced the last film I made, By Modern Measure, that I was here [at Sundance] with a couple years ago. It's this sense of wanting to take some action, in terms of all the crazy problems that we're facing in the world, but not knowing what to do. I look back to the '60s and I think about the Vietnam War and the civil rights movement. They were these really cohesive things that young people were focusing on, to try to make a positive impact. Now it seems like there's just so much going on, things are spread so thin, that I'm not exactly sure what to do. So it seemed like making a movie would be a way to express that feeling of still not really knowing exactly what to do."

-Matthew Lessner, director of "The Woods"


^^^ Well, he summed it up just perfectly.

Saw that film last night, the execution of this message was a little shaky. But overall, this dude is feeling the exact same way I am, and many other of this generation. He made a film, which is a powerful thing, but I think it could have been a little bit more productive in terms of actually getting young people inspired and passionate. But interesting and unique nonetheless.

Such a draft through the window

This album fit perfectly into today's hangover-free COLD, grey morning. If I ever have kids, this will be their lullaby.

Sun, piano, and sweet potatoes

I'm graced with delicious food, art on the wall, piano in the background, and sun in the sky. Portland has been good to me lately. I have been good to myself lately.

I've been busy with other things which has caused me to take attention off of the huge plethora of new bands and music to be listened to. But of course I've still been watching out. This one caught my attention and rightfully so. It's great between the vocals and the simplicity. Simplicty has been known to hit the spot.


Devils Hearts Grow Gold by La Sera by goincase

Swimming

Whenever, and I mean whenever, I get wrapped up in other people and worrying about their opinions or thoughts, any freedom or creativity I have just dissapears. This is how it works. It's dangerous to my well being. I know the winter will continue to bring gray skies but I am setting out to become well-balanced and progressive. I'm going to read a lot. I want to read about people who inspire me or can give me a fresh perspective. I'm going to visualize my perfect future and get better at painting pictures in my mind. I'm going to plan the perfect summer, or make plans that will leave room for this potential. I'm going to see music and look at photographs. Also take my own. I'm going to leave campus as frequently as possible and refrain from smoking cigarettes unless I want them.

I'm going to become my happy, simple self once again, and shy away from the things that always set me off my rhythm.

Swimming and trying to find the surface. But It's just life, you know.


5 Kora by The Qiwu Selftet

Deserted and in love

I want to store us in a mason jar and use the contents when I forget what I've learned. Let's just be young and do anything and everything we want to. Let's run at full speed and make things happen. I've craved the clear vision I had with you in the endless country.

Just 2 kids in the desert, their only cares were sunshine and each other. They lived by no rules except freedom. Silent laughs and greasy hair, youth was their biggest weapon.

Gila - Beach House by Koolkat Kurtman

Beyond the Library

"If we lack the courage to shape our lives by constantly generating love, fear usually takes up the reins and creates all kids of brilliant havoc. Some of our greatest artistic creations have probably sprouted from such modest, moldy demons as paranoia and indecision. Those polarized by fear and over-thinking often share a rare disorder in creation, always in a perpetual hurdle leap to push past the pervious and arrive at an unattainable.

i guess, you know what the sun’s all about when the lights go out."

-Rachel Lynch

Embracing this period of time. This time where little seems right and I'm drifting along. I know it's necessary, though. I have to solidify the in betweens and desires. What I've learned is that confusion and wandering is part of the complete process. You gotta work from the inside out, or else you'll never really be able to achieve the unthinkable.

I've got assignments that go far beyond the late night library visits.

Marriage - Gold Panda by funktional

Going back to Cali

I dig this. Something about their sound, and the fact their EP is up for free on SoundCloud. It's so great that musicians are developing a sort of guilt for making their fans pay to listen to their music. If you think about it, musicians play music because they want to play music, and they have passion for it (if they didn't nobody would listen, or like it for that matter). They do it because it is who they are and what they do. Money is a plus but hopefully not the reason to play it in the first place. If a band is making good music, they'll get their rewards. Guards - Trophy Queen (feat. Caroline Polachek) by Toast Press

Going home to Mt. Shasta today. I know I'll miss Portland by the end of the break, even though Portland and I have a sort of iffy relationship. I know once I step back and see the opposite, I'll have the same urge to come back and experience this unfamiliar and intriguing place. Even though so many days I feel like I'm a floater, lost and confused.

Try to hold onto my drink and my heart

Musicians are just people who have found a source to express their normal people like problems. Case in point, this song. 

"The music is loud and time travels fast,
things that feel good are things that don't last, 
while you go off looking for friends in the dark,
I try to hold on to my drink and my heart."

Dry sky

And the worst thing you could do is suffer inside your head. The most freedom I 've ever felt was when my mind was clear from self-questioning. Without that, real progress is made. Lets get this show on the road, I know the great things I'm capable of.

I am nothing without a sharp mind, fitted to think pure and powerful thoughts.


TAMARYN-mild confusion by The Drift Record Shop

Dark from your head to your toes

After a week of busy homework and assignments, I'm exploring blogs and listening to Pavement and James Blake. This week has been hard, school wise and me wise. I'm fighting so hard to find my rhythm, and the best part is once I do (which I will), It will be heaven. Heaven in the rainy and tidy streets of PDX. I wonder how someone like her so happily bobs her head to the music coming from the ear buds. If she can be happy at 11 p.m. in a messy dorm room, why can't I? The gray shades of routines and loneliness are tugging at my legs. But this time, I'm gonna rescue myself.


James Blake - Air & Lack Thereof by AMMtru

Over quick and awkward cigarette conversations, you tell me you wouldn't care if you were dead. You like the possibility of dying at any given moment. You're so twisted and exactly the type I visualized as a dreamy and curious 18 year old stuck in the mountains.You even wear the same clothing as I imagined. Often all in black, from your hair to your dark eyes to your boots. You add to the broken record. Working a relationship backwards. It's obviously become a consistency. But you, my eerie friend, will soon see me in my raw form. And I'll be hesitant and gentle. Soon, I will touch and feel each fresh step on the pavement. I will move past this time and discover the unknown I've been dreaming of. Soon, I will have mustered up the strength to unravel.

I'll Be Wait For Sadness Comes Along

Oh, the shit I should be doing instead of this. I sat down at my computer, ready to crank out some more homework. But I didn't. Instead, I gave my soul some happy music. So easy to get lost in the internet, looking at band's websites, discovering new songs you love in the first 10 seconds. Or looking at somebody's twitter page that you are fascinated with. It's all so accessible. Reading conversations between some of your favorite musicians. Knowing the name you see on hypemachine everyday with triple digit red hearts on the right is actually a person, just like you. What a life to live, a life of pure expression and, well, fun. A way to be happy on this earth, maybe. I'll Be Wait For Sadness Comes Along by chrome sparks

The Mountain

Between spending time in Bend this weekend, hearing Pavement's song mention "Shasta", and now finding and loving this song.... I am reminded of the part of me that yearns for the beauty of the mountains. Even being able to take a walk under a bluebird sky, the next morning after a storm or sitting by crystal alpine lakes at sunrise.... I am looking for a different form of complete peace here in Portland. Heartless Bastards - The Mountain by tadpolegames

I call it, Novembeard

http://www.mediafire.com/file/iae9b8xddcqj6rn/christinasplaylist.rar

November playlist right thurrrr.

(Downloading zipeg might be necessary to unzip this)

Just a collection of songs I've been into in the recent months. Lately, all I want to listen to is rock. Indie rock, if you will. Went through a really long phase where all I listened to was electronic dance music, one day that changed, and here I am. From time to time I'll download electro or a remix (some of it is really impressive), but for the most part I'm looking for this type of stuff. There's not much that can replace the sound of wholesome instruments and vocals, at least that's how I feel about it now.

The snow is falling in the Pacific NW. I love seeing everybody's reaction, they're totally freakin' out. Snow is such a beautiful thing. In my opinion, it's prettier if it's burying plants and sidewalks and making everything seem still. Here, it's just moving through the sky and turning into moisture before it hits the ground. But whatever the type, it was awesome to see all the kids pour out of the buildings to celebrate it. Cheering like children in the frozen wind.

Breakneck Speed

Damn this song pumps me up. I heard this a few weeks ago, asked my friend the name of the band and I found it today while going through music. Was a really busy week but part of me really enjoys staying in constant flow, even if it is with school. Hello, weekend. Tokyo Police Club - Breakneck Speed by The Drift Record Shop

Gold Soundz

Aaahh. This song is so perfect at this moment, who knows why, it just gives me a feeling. A feeling that is closest to being described by this song. And I know it's totally specific to this exact moment, these circumstances, my reality right here, right now. At this second, I know what I want, and that's not the case for most seconds. Although I might "want" something different tomorrow, the fact that I have something to focus on right now makes me feel in control of my life.

The funny thing about music is how different it affects people. It's more than just the notes, instruments, beats, or lyrics. In the end it's just about the emotion it evokes. And often, that emotion is completely unique to that one person who always gets that certain feeling when listening to that one song.

  Pavement - Gold Soundz by pluxy

What the Bleep

http://topdocumentaryfilms.com/what-the-bleep-do-we-know/

Click on that for some serious reevaluation of life as we know it.


Just by living in a way where I'm aware of the possibilities makes those possibilities even more real. Our world and our life is directly shaped by our conscious and our perception of reality. Watch this and you'll see the science behind it. Recommend taking the time for this one, puts things into a different light.

Fucking Create Something Awesome

Smith Westerns - Weekend by forcefieldpr


 Don't look to others for reassurance. It's all from you. Do what feels right. Be yourself in all flying colors and expressions. Who gives A FUCK. The right people will always find you or you will come to them. Things do work out. In the meantime, fucking create something awesome.

I give myself advice when I'm feeling uncomfortable.


;)